~! A World of Love !
Live to Love, Love to Live ~
surfing the net for the past few hr trying to look for a good design for my blog .. but cant seem to find any..guess i wun be changing the design afterall as i like this design a lot ... there is no better design around... hehe...
feeling really down recently ... cant seem to have the zest to do anything ... just feel like being alone .. all alone n do nothing .... actually i was hoping to see someone...to talk to him or simply to be with him ... since its not a possible choice cos he isnt free , i will just have to be alone.... thinking a lot recently ...abt all the thing that have happened ...cant sleep well for the past few days ... but i'm feeling better now ... i know wat i need to do now .. whenever such things happen or similar things happen i will just start thinking n get upsad n dunno wat to do.. .wasting my time n thinking n thinking without doing anything ... n i will always regret after that for not doing wat i want to do .....its always the case for mi ... cos i think too much... i will concern abt other people involved it this too much that i'm afraid that wat i will do will hurt another person ....n of course afraid that i will get hurt too ... but wat is there for mi to be afraid of really ... i onli live once... n i have had too much regret in my life that i dun wish to regret anymore ...i will rather choose to give it a try n the most get hurt than i dun try n regret for my life forever .... especially when its someone so important to mi ... n someone that i dun want to lose in my life ... i had thought of letting go a lot of times.... really a lot of times ... but now , since i got the answer that i always want to hear ... do i still want to let go ... NO ... NO WAY .... i wun ... for all these yrs, i have been waiting for these words.. these words to let mi know that i wasnt thinking too much n wat i'm thinking n feeling is true ... its real... though it might be a little too late n your feeling is gone since it has been so long liao ... but i will still want to give it a try ... at least , i wun want myself to have any regret in my life again ...
i know u have made up ur mind ... i have been thinking really a lot this few days ... i want u to be happy too..n i dun want anyone to get hurt too... especially when i know someone needed u more than i do... but u are also that important to mi that i do want to let go ... i know u wanted mi to find someone else n be happy n live happily. .. but u are the only one i want in my life now... i would have settle for someone else if i want ... but i cant .. cos i dun want ... cos i only want u ...maybe 10 yrs down the road , i will really fall for someone else n get married n have kids ... but i know i will definity regret if i just let go now ... maybe i couldnt even live till then ... i know there is a lot of things that u know but i dun ... i'm not trying to change anything ... n i know u dun want to hurt mi too .. even if u dun love mi .. its okie ... but i just want u to know that i do ... love is not something that i can control... n yes ... when the moment is gone, its gone ..but for me .. the moment is not gone yet ... cos if it has gone, i wun be feeling this heart ache now ... i wun want to be with anyone else now ... so dun stop mi from loving u ... at least , make mi have no regret in my life from now on ...
but all n all ... i want u to be happy too ... thats the most important thing.. for u to be happy ...
posted by Trish daydreaming at 12/05/2004 01:37:00 PM
